Now we are up to the exciting part....assimilation! This is where I do my best to move towards my vision by whatever means possible. Apparently I just have to try stuff and learn from it (whether it works or not is irrelevant). It's the persistence and the momentum that will pay off.
So I'm going to try some stuff. Only I'm not real sure what stuff just yet. But surely I'll figure it out as I go.
If there's one theory I do subscribe to, it's leaving the house.....as it's not likely he will knock on my front door. So the real trick is going to be leaving the house A LOT. Apart from my usual online activities that is. Not to down play them, they often lead to me getting out the house after all!
I'm a little concerned that this is not a new approach though. I mean, I already leave the house a lot. Every day in fact. So there has to be more to it than that. I think it might have to be about how I act when I'm out of the house. Hmmm, not sure. Well, I'll act different then. Unclear as to how yet - but I will.
Maybe it would help if I started with some loose goals in place? Oh scary, objectives mean I have to get serious and try and achieve them. The pressure! I feel fear and trepidation building in the pit of my stomach.
But I'm game. Let's go I guess, nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that. This is what I'm going to try:
- To go on a date once a week minimum (online dates count)
- To approach one attractive male EVERY time I go out to a pub /bar/ club and engage him in conversation
- Ask at least one friend in the next 4 weeks to set me up on a blind date
- Ask at least one man out a month - online doesn't count
OMG I feel sick now, I've just agreed to meet at mate at the pub tonight to play trivia. Actually he was kind of more than a mate, but not any longer. Is it even appropriate to approach a man whilst out with him? What if there are no attractive men at the pub? What then hey?
I guess you'll find out the answer to that tomorrow. May the force be with me.
xxxoooxxx
Monday, March 31, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Prospecting for gold
So here we are. I've done a good job of filling you in on my past relationships....but there's more to the current reality than that!
A bit about me.
On the outside: I'm 170cm and weigh 65kgs (on a good /thin day). I'm athletic and not in the way that means I'm flat chested. I've just done lots of sport! Actually I think you can see I'm not flat chested from my lovely picture. I've got green eyes, a big smile and shoulder length blond hair. I am most famous for my great legs. I've spent too much time in the sun so I will admit that I've got more lines on my face than I'd like. I spend plenty of money on grooming - hair, skincare, nails, clothes accessories. All up I hope you'd say I'm well put together?
On the inside: I'm friendly, confident, social, passionate, emotional, occasionally jealous, optimistic, competitive, honest, loyal, empathetic, self indulgent, driven and above all good fun.
I've got a great job, actually it's even a proper grown up career. I firmly fall into the 'high income' bracket. Not that I've ever got any money! I've had a lot of fun travelling, shopping and generally living the high life though. And my career is also very social, it extends into travel, parties and the like frequently. So you'd think I'd meet loads of men. Well you'd think wrong.
In fact at this point, my primary resource to meet men is online dating. I'm open to suggestions, set ups, and any other ideas if you have them. Because to go from my current reality to my future I realise it's going to take some effort! Whilst I like the idea of 'The Secret', something tells me, having a plan and working to an objective is maybe just a little more realistic. I think his name is Robert Fritz.
There are men around, don't get me wrong. In fact I've met several potential Mr Visions. I just haven't met one yet who considers me to be Mrs Vision! And so, here we are at my currently reality. I am single. I am very single. I am quite along way from my future vision. In fact I'm miles away.
I do have a few current prospects. They're not big features when you add in the word reality to current though. But I've got to start somewhere right. Just watch me pull out some never going to happens for this list. Well tough, this is my blog and I'll do as a I please. :)
Potential Mr Visions - the ones that make my heart beat faster -
The Friend. The friend is history. He looks like Mr Vision. He acts like Mr Vision. Apart from the adores me part. After months of friendship I hinted at my vision and our friendship ended. This was 4 years ago. The friend still pops up though. He's a facebook friend. He is at the outskirts of my social web. And when he does pop up all those 'he could be Mr Vision' feelings return. He is also annoyingly still single aged 37. So what's not to love about me I ask you The Friend?!
The Catch. The Catch is gorgeous. He is fit, successful, well off, well groomed. And so friendly! The Catch is also in his late 30s. And single. He is a friend of friends through a couple of varying avenues. I don't think I'm the only one who considers him The Catch though, in fact I fear I may have a lot of competition on this one. I tend to bump the catch on the ski slopes or at trendy bars. He always seems excited to see me. But he's never asked me out. I haven't actually seen him for about 3 months. But he's on the list ok?!
Conference man. You guessed it, I met conference man at....a conference. He is a bit shorter than I'd usually go for but apart from that, he really does fit the Vision specs quite well. He is attractive, successful, friendly, confident and from what I can tell SINGLE. After the conference I dropped him a line. Since then we've had a little email banter. We've run into each other at Hugo's. And another conference. He has initiated contact...I mean he even linked me in. But he hasn't asked me out.
Potential Mr Visions - the ones that don't make my heart beat faster -
Mr Local. Met him online. We've been out twice. He's not been quick to follow up for date number three. He ticks a few boxes - house in my suburb, tall, dark, well dressed. We've had one kiss. Maybe he didn't enjoy it? Actually I wasn't all that impressed. Serious lack of tongue! But I'm still waiting for date 3 to confirm.
Mr Fin. Mr Fin is hot, hot, hot!!!! Actually he could actually move up as he has the potential to make my heart beat faster. He is from Finland, a 36 year old lawyer. We met for coffee. We have loosely planned a date at the golf driving range next weekend. I'm going to work on the friendship first basis. Probably as that's all he seems to be interested in right now.
Mr Small Business. We met last night - you know how I had to run off. He's nice. He does tick a few boxes. But he also didn't quite look like My vision. But I'm prepared to give him a shot. He does need to prove he is capable of conversing without his business problems cropping up. Because I have to admit he seemed to struggle with this one. He's nice though. Smart. Right age. Driven. Nice looking. Could do with a few gym sessions. But still nice. So this one may be one to watch.
So now you know my prospects. Stay tuned for more developments. And there will be developments I can assure you. Robert Fritz said if I could create the vision I could have it, and I'm here to prove him right ok!
xxxoooxxx
A bit about me.
On the outside: I'm 170cm and weigh 65kgs (on a good /thin day). I'm athletic and not in the way that means I'm flat chested. I've just done lots of sport! Actually I think you can see I'm not flat chested from my lovely picture. I've got green eyes, a big smile and shoulder length blond hair. I am most famous for my great legs. I've spent too much time in the sun so I will admit that I've got more lines on my face than I'd like. I spend plenty of money on grooming - hair, skincare, nails, clothes accessories. All up I hope you'd say I'm well put together?
On the inside: I'm friendly, confident, social, passionate, emotional, occasionally jealous, optimistic, competitive, honest, loyal, empathetic, self indulgent, driven and above all good fun.
I've got a great job, actually it's even a proper grown up career. I firmly fall into the 'high income' bracket. Not that I've ever got any money! I've had a lot of fun travelling, shopping and generally living the high life though. And my career is also very social, it extends into travel, parties and the like frequently. So you'd think I'd meet loads of men. Well you'd think wrong.
In fact at this point, my primary resource to meet men is online dating. I'm open to suggestions, set ups, and any other ideas if you have them. Because to go from my current reality to my future I realise it's going to take some effort! Whilst I like the idea of 'The Secret', something tells me, having a plan and working to an objective is maybe just a little more realistic. I think his name is Robert Fritz.
There are men around, don't get me wrong. In fact I've met several potential Mr Visions. I just haven't met one yet who considers me to be Mrs Vision! And so, here we are at my currently reality. I am single. I am very single. I am quite along way from my future vision. In fact I'm miles away.
I do have a few current prospects. They're not big features when you add in the word reality to current though. But I've got to start somewhere right. Just watch me pull out some never going to happens for this list. Well tough, this is my blog and I'll do as a I please. :)
Potential Mr Visions - the ones that make my heart beat faster -
The Friend. The friend is history. He looks like Mr Vision. He acts like Mr Vision. Apart from the adores me part. After months of friendship I hinted at my vision and our friendship ended. This was 4 years ago. The friend still pops up though. He's a facebook friend. He is at the outskirts of my social web. And when he does pop up all those 'he could be Mr Vision' feelings return. He is also annoyingly still single aged 37. So what's not to love about me I ask you The Friend?!
The Catch. The Catch is gorgeous. He is fit, successful, well off, well groomed. And so friendly! The Catch is also in his late 30s. And single. He is a friend of friends through a couple of varying avenues. I don't think I'm the only one who considers him The Catch though, in fact I fear I may have a lot of competition on this one. I tend to bump the catch on the ski slopes or at trendy bars. He always seems excited to see me. But he's never asked me out. I haven't actually seen him for about 3 months. But he's on the list ok?!
Conference man. You guessed it, I met conference man at....a conference. He is a bit shorter than I'd usually go for but apart from that, he really does fit the Vision specs quite well. He is attractive, successful, friendly, confident and from what I can tell SINGLE. After the conference I dropped him a line. Since then we've had a little email banter. We've run into each other at Hugo's. And another conference. He has initiated contact...I mean he even linked me in. But he hasn't asked me out.
Potential Mr Visions - the ones that don't make my heart beat faster -
Mr Local. Met him online. We've been out twice. He's not been quick to follow up for date number three. He ticks a few boxes - house in my suburb, tall, dark, well dressed. We've had one kiss. Maybe he didn't enjoy it? Actually I wasn't all that impressed. Serious lack of tongue! But I'm still waiting for date 3 to confirm.
Mr Fin. Mr Fin is hot, hot, hot!!!! Actually he could actually move up as he has the potential to make my heart beat faster. He is from Finland, a 36 year old lawyer. We met for coffee. We have loosely planned a date at the golf driving range next weekend. I'm going to work on the friendship first basis. Probably as that's all he seems to be interested in right now.
Mr Small Business. We met last night - you know how I had to run off. He's nice. He does tick a few boxes. But he also didn't quite look like My vision. But I'm prepared to give him a shot. He does need to prove he is capable of conversing without his business problems cropping up. Because I have to admit he seemed to struggle with this one. He's nice though. Smart. Right age. Driven. Nice looking. Could do with a few gym sessions. But still nice. So this one may be one to watch.
So now you know my prospects. Stay tuned for more developments. And there will be developments I can assure you. Robert Fritz said if I could create the vision I could have it, and I'm here to prove him right ok!
xxxoooxxx
Saturday, March 29, 2008
My Current Reality
I hope you enjoyed my vision, I know I did. Unfortunately it's now time to come back down to earth. And my current reality is somewhat different than my future!
Reality...
Whilst I was a bit of a heart breaker in my late teens and twenties, since hitting thirty it's been a wee bit different. OK very different actually. I can't think of a bloke I didn't scare off somehow...within a matter of months. 10 weeks on average. As for me leaving a blossoming relationship (you know the type when you have progressed to referring to each other as boy/girlfriend), I'm afraid it hasn't happened. I'm actually scratching my head right now trying to come up with one..something. I will at least list the ones that have featured. You will of course notice that none of them were even good enough for me!!!!
Gavin. Gavin was actually a long term leftover from my twenties. We moved in together at his insistence just prior my 30th birthday. I was pretty confident I was sorted, marriage and children would follow shortly. And they did. Just not with me! Gavin and I broke up 6 weeks after I turned 30. His excuse, he couldn't stand the fights we were having as work was also stressful. I've asked around. It wasn't my fault, any normal bird who has a defacto off visiting his 6 month old child and ex every Sunday....and keeping my presence under wraps (he didn't want to pay maintenance so was trying to keep the peace!) would have been giving said partner grief. One week after we broke up Gavin met Lynn. She moved in to our flat. Gavin and Lynn are now married with two kids. I swear I'm OK with it. No really.
Paul. I dated Paul for two months but what started out as adoration turned to indifference within I don't know, maybe 6 weeks. Actually this one drifted, I didn't get dumped. Does that count?!
Jamie. Cringe. Don't know what I was thinking he was 5 foot 7. Eeeew. I started out not too keen on him at all but going with the flow (I had cobwebs to clear). Very soon after we started dating he somehow got my mum to invite him to Xmas day. Dad got drunk and tried to punch him. Excellent! Things went down hill fast after that. Actually I think my dad was on to something, he was a long way from my type, it would never have worked!
Andy. Out of them all, the most serious in a way. Andy was an ex I'd met in the UK who resurfaced. Gorgeous Andy, a typical Libran who to this day suffers from the grass in greener syndrome. Andy moved in. Andy tried to get a job and sponsorship. Andy failed. I can't actually call this a dumping. But then again he didn't ever ask me to move to the UK with him. To be honest by the time he flew out I'd gotten a bit over the relationship. At the airport he sobbed and I comforted dry eyed. Maybe I dumped him after all?!
Mark. Mark was a set up through friends. Another one that my gut feel was...not the one for me. Who I then proceeded become quite keen on! Mark was still in love with his ex. Actually come to think of it so was Jamie! After a couple of months with Mark I started to fill the chill. The dumping followed soon after...
Richard. The worst of the worst. Richard claimed he loved me within a week. Again I was not too sure he was quite good enough for wonderful me. He wore me down with adoration and I started to believe I loved him too. 10 happy weeks later, he had shoulder reconstruction. He cried and thanked god he met me at the hospital. But when he got out of hospital things went pear shaped. He was spotted kissing another girl at the beach. I forgave him. He dumped me. Can I just say here and now THANK THE LORD!
Greg. Greg followed shortly after Richard. He was a chef. A bit tubby but otherwise quite handsome. He seemed to think he was gods gift. He liked to bring me down to earth with comments such as 'you're very attractive but I wouldn't call you hot'...followed by, "Now Kate my flatmate, she's hot". I am ashamed to admit I tried to up my hot factor. First I lost a few kg. Then I had botox. I might have been looking good but Greg only had eyes for Kate. So, after about 10 weeks (if you are thinking there is a pattern re 10 weeks, you're right) he dumped me. He claimed he didn't see a long term future with me so didn't want to waste my time. Yeah right, all he could see was his hot flatmate. Who funnily enough he never managed to con into a relationship. :)
Having been through this exercise, I've come to the decision that my currently reality is actually this. I haven't met the right man. I've tried to overcome this by falling in love with whomever was standing there. But you know what, not one of the above men were even close to being the man in my vision.
I'm ready for him to come now. And whilst you may say I'm too fussy, I don't think that's possible when you're on the hunt for a life partner. So guess what....I'm not going to settle for anything less, and I'm starting right now!
Next up I will take you through all of my current prospects. But right now, I've got to run. I've got a date.
xxxoooxxx
Reality...
Whilst I was a bit of a heart breaker in my late teens and twenties, since hitting thirty it's been a wee bit different. OK very different actually. I can't think of a bloke I didn't scare off somehow...within a matter of months. 10 weeks on average. As for me leaving a blossoming relationship (you know the type when you have progressed to referring to each other as boy/girlfriend), I'm afraid it hasn't happened. I'm actually scratching my head right now trying to come up with one..something. I will at least list the ones that have featured. You will of course notice that none of them were even good enough for me!!!!
Gavin. Gavin was actually a long term leftover from my twenties. We moved in together at his insistence just prior my 30th birthday. I was pretty confident I was sorted, marriage and children would follow shortly. And they did. Just not with me! Gavin and I broke up 6 weeks after I turned 30. His excuse, he couldn't stand the fights we were having as work was also stressful. I've asked around. It wasn't my fault, any normal bird who has a defacto off visiting his 6 month old child and ex every Sunday....and keeping my presence under wraps (he didn't want to pay maintenance so was trying to keep the peace!) would have been giving said partner grief. One week after we broke up Gavin met Lynn. She moved in to our flat. Gavin and Lynn are now married with two kids. I swear I'm OK with it. No really.
Paul. I dated Paul for two months but what started out as adoration turned to indifference within I don't know, maybe 6 weeks. Actually this one drifted, I didn't get dumped. Does that count?!
Jamie. Cringe. Don't know what I was thinking he was 5 foot 7. Eeeew. I started out not too keen on him at all but going with the flow (I had cobwebs to clear). Very soon after we started dating he somehow got my mum to invite him to Xmas day. Dad got drunk and tried to punch him. Excellent! Things went down hill fast after that. Actually I think my dad was on to something, he was a long way from my type, it would never have worked!
Andy. Out of them all, the most serious in a way. Andy was an ex I'd met in the UK who resurfaced. Gorgeous Andy, a typical Libran who to this day suffers from the grass in greener syndrome. Andy moved in. Andy tried to get a job and sponsorship. Andy failed. I can't actually call this a dumping. But then again he didn't ever ask me to move to the UK with him. To be honest by the time he flew out I'd gotten a bit over the relationship. At the airport he sobbed and I comforted dry eyed. Maybe I dumped him after all?!
Mark. Mark was a set up through friends. Another one that my gut feel was...not the one for me. Who I then proceeded become quite keen on! Mark was still in love with his ex. Actually come to think of it so was Jamie! After a couple of months with Mark I started to fill the chill. The dumping followed soon after...
Richard. The worst of the worst. Richard claimed he loved me within a week. Again I was not too sure he was quite good enough for wonderful me. He wore me down with adoration and I started to believe I loved him too. 10 happy weeks later, he had shoulder reconstruction. He cried and thanked god he met me at the hospital. But when he got out of hospital things went pear shaped. He was spotted kissing another girl at the beach. I forgave him. He dumped me. Can I just say here and now THANK THE LORD!
Greg. Greg followed shortly after Richard. He was a chef. A bit tubby but otherwise quite handsome. He seemed to think he was gods gift. He liked to bring me down to earth with comments such as 'you're very attractive but I wouldn't call you hot'...followed by, "Now Kate my flatmate, she's hot". I am ashamed to admit I tried to up my hot factor. First I lost a few kg. Then I had botox. I might have been looking good but Greg only had eyes for Kate. So, after about 10 weeks (if you are thinking there is a pattern re 10 weeks, you're right) he dumped me. He claimed he didn't see a long term future with me so didn't want to waste my time. Yeah right, all he could see was his hot flatmate. Who funnily enough he never managed to con into a relationship. :)
Having been through this exercise, I've come to the decision that my currently reality is actually this. I haven't met the right man. I've tried to overcome this by falling in love with whomever was standing there. But you know what, not one of the above men were even close to being the man in my vision.
I'm ready for him to come now. And whilst you may say I'm too fussy, I don't think that's possible when you're on the hunt for a life partner. So guess what....I'm not going to settle for anything less, and I'm starting right now!
Next up I will take you through all of my current prospects. But right now, I've got to run. I've got a date.
xxxoooxxx
The Path of Least Resistance
I've been reading Robert Fritz's book of the above title. It seems Rob has gone and got me convinced that I can create whatever results I want in this life of mine. Which is excellent really as I'd almost given up on achieving the result of marrying my one true love. Especially as I haven't even met him yet. Also quite concerned about the creating the sound of the patter of little feet, the sort that are on the bottom of my own children's legs!
So here I am. A single 36 (actually very soon to be 37...) year old who is about to embark on the journey of creating all of the above. This is going to be a very exciting journey, which in turn I'm sure will be a great story, so I thought I'd invite you along for the ride. Strap yourself in, we're going Husband Hunting!
Robert's given me some early instruction. First I'm to form THE Vision of what I want. Think I might start on the man part, I might need him for the small feet. Then I'm to clearly define my current reality. So here goes.
My vision of the relationship I am choosing to create is:-
Oh it's a bit fuzzy but starting to come into focus. I can see me with a man. Oh he's looking at me so lovingly! I think he might actually adore me. He's tall. Over 6 foot. Athletic physique, wow he's handsome! In an older many kind of way. We are glowing together, I look so pleased with myself. The connection is palpable. He's well groomed, really like that outfit. I'm looking pretty good myself. We must work out together! He's in his very dapper work clothes. He's telling me about his day actually. We're sitting in a very groovy looking restaurant, constantly touching and catching up on the days events. He has a great job and he's doing very well at it. I can see I admire his intellect, passion and drive. He just cracked me up, looks like I'm losing it, I'm giggling so much! And now he's listening to my day. He's so supportive and encouraging. He makes me feel like together we can achieve anything at all! I love how confident we in our relationship, you can see there is enormous mutual love and respect. The sort of couple you just know were meant to be. Hang on what are we talking about now??? I love it! We're planning an overseas holiday together. I can see what I'm thinking...maybe he'll propose while we're away and god I look like I would jump and down and scream yes when he does! Oh my phones ringing now. It's my sister. She's just checking in to see if we're still coming over after dinner as Damian really wants to see my man. Seems like my family are all thrilled for me and really like him. This is great! Now my nephews grabbed the phone off her and asking to speak to him. Wow he's such a hit. Oh he's hanging up. He's holding my hand and saying....I can't wait to have kids with you.
Gee I'm enjoying this vision so much I think I'm going to have to take a rain check on the current reality part. You'll just have to wait for tomorrows post.
Right I'm off. I've got a husband to hunt for. Not sure how far I'm going to get given I'm going for dinner with my mum, sister and her kids. Wish me luck anyway!
xxxoooxxx
So here I am. A single 36 (actually very soon to be 37...) year old who is about to embark on the journey of creating all of the above. This is going to be a very exciting journey, which in turn I'm sure will be a great story, so I thought I'd invite you along for the ride. Strap yourself in, we're going Husband Hunting!
Robert's given me some early instruction. First I'm to form THE Vision of what I want. Think I might start on the man part, I might need him for the small feet. Then I'm to clearly define my current reality. So here goes.
My vision of the relationship I am choosing to create is:-
Oh it's a bit fuzzy but starting to come into focus. I can see me with a man. Oh he's looking at me so lovingly! I think he might actually adore me. He's tall. Over 6 foot. Athletic physique, wow he's handsome! In an older many kind of way. We are glowing together, I look so pleased with myself. The connection is palpable. He's well groomed, really like that outfit. I'm looking pretty good myself. We must work out together! He's in his very dapper work clothes. He's telling me about his day actually. We're sitting in a very groovy looking restaurant, constantly touching and catching up on the days events. He has a great job and he's doing very well at it. I can see I admire his intellect, passion and drive. He just cracked me up, looks like I'm losing it, I'm giggling so much! And now he's listening to my day. He's so supportive and encouraging. He makes me feel like together we can achieve anything at all! I love how confident we in our relationship, you can see there is enormous mutual love and respect. The sort of couple you just know were meant to be. Hang on what are we talking about now??? I love it! We're planning an overseas holiday together. I can see what I'm thinking...maybe he'll propose while we're away and god I look like I would jump and down and scream yes when he does! Oh my phones ringing now. It's my sister. She's just checking in to see if we're still coming over after dinner as Damian really wants to see my man. Seems like my family are all thrilled for me and really like him. This is great! Now my nephews grabbed the phone off her and asking to speak to him. Wow he's such a hit. Oh he's hanging up. He's holding my hand and saying....I can't wait to have kids with you.
Gee I'm enjoying this vision so much I think I'm going to have to take a rain check on the current reality part. You'll just have to wait for tomorrows post.
Right I'm off. I've got a husband to hunt for. Not sure how far I'm going to get given I'm going for dinner with my mum, sister and her kids. Wish me luck anyway!
xxxoooxxx
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